MrsB

It’s no surprise to anyone who’s a mother that motherhood changes you. It changes you in ways you predicted (e.g. boobs – gone, bellybutton – ‘frowning’) but it also changes you in ways you never thought about (e.g. not being able to watch the news, not being able to listen to music when home alone because all you want to listen to is SILENCE).

In my case I’ve also noticed that ever since my last baby was born, I’ve actually for the first time started to have PMS :|. The fact that for 33 years I never really felt like I ever had PMS is I guess good for me, but to get it NOW is sort of not very hilarious. [...]

Ughhh… yesterday was a blur. I had been feeling a bit off on Sunday afternoon but since Oliver has a cold I thought nothing of it – my body can fight off a cold before it can properly hit me. At 1am though I was jolted awake by some serious stomach pains. I took a couple of paracetamols and slept on and off until it was time to get up. On and off meaning up every hour as I was still in pain and Oliver was in between us coughing.

In the morning I got ready for work still feeling lousy but I got on the tube regardless. I sat there for 10 minutes sipping some warm apple juice and then realised I was not going to make it – I felt so weak and nauseous, and I got off and came back home. [...]

Our little holiday in Corwall was so nice, coming back to London and running the Run to the Beat half marathon last Sunday was nice and then – then everything’s gone downhill. Little trivial things in the great scheme of things, but little things add up…

So what’s happened? Well, Tuesday and Wednesday in CrossFit have left me really sore again and for some reason I’m not able to find joy in that soreness this time. For some reason it hit me really hard on Wednesday morning that I’m at least 10 years older than everyone else in my class and just twice a week CrossFit makes me exhausted and sore. Also, there is only 1, sometimes 2 women in my classes… they are very nice but in general I feel really out-of-place in a big group of guys, I feel like a fraud, like a silly old geriatric trying to keep up with the young kids. The sabotager part of my brain has been saying: Who am I kidding? I will never have a six-pack. Those abs of mine have been shot to shreds by those lovely kids of mine. I will never be able to do 10 pushups or even a single pull-up. I’m an old woman.

I hate that part of my brain… [...]

I was going to write a proper post but can’t. Everything is just too effed right now. J cannot sit or stand up due to some virus… a virus that’s damaged the balance system in his head. Doctors didn’t say how long recovery will take or what he should do other than rest… Naturally he’s [...]

My 6-year old has been out of school for 25 days. My 3-year old has been out of nursery for 27 days. My husband has had an on/off fever and a chest infection for 12 days. My mother has been away in Estonia and bedridden with pneumonia for 17 days. We haven’t had a cleaner [...]

I’ve discovered that December really isn’t one of my favourite months. I mean it starts out all nice:

- in the beginning we have our wedding anniversary which we tend to spend in a spa all loved up;
- then school finishes with all the lovely Christmas plays and fairs and general excitement;
- then when double digits start it’s J’s birthday, which the kids love as they get to blow out candles on a bday cake;
- but then when the double digits start rolling on, the weather gets nastier, windier and is still snowless, everyone starts getting sick one by one and no one in the household can no longer sleep through the nights AND the kids ask every darn minute of their waking moments whether it’s Christmas yet… [...]

James plonked a copy of the Evening Standard on the table last night and one of the headlines caught my attention: “What a waist… the secrets behind Kate Middleton’s waspish shape”. My initial thought was “oh thank god, they’re finally going to write about how dreadfully thin she’s become and how it’s genetically not possible [...]

Oh hi, I’ve been having so much fun on Twitter that I forgot that I had a blog. Well, the Twitter part is true, but I haven’t actually blogged much because: it’s been raining a lot (yuck) my umbrella has 3 holes in it (brrr) James has been working until midnight every night (yuck) boys [...]

I think today is the day will ramble. I usually never do that.

It’s raining… again. We had a week of summer in April and nothing in May and then again a few days in the beginning of June, but the past week has sucked freezing temperatures and gale force winds and rain and rain and rain. Yuck. I think I have one of them Seasonal Mood Disorder things – I am totally unable to get that “life’s a peach” feeling when I’m freezing… [...]

My mother’s gone to Estonia until January, so yesterday was my first day home alone with both kids.  They exhausted me :D Last night in addition to the fidget who sleeps in our bed, Oskar came to our room about 5 times every hour from 1am onwards. Today his stomach hurts, his ears hurt and [...]

It was our last evening in Portsmouth.  We decided at 4pm to take a taxi to the aquarium to look around for an hour or so before dinner to end our action packed mini-holiday.  I called a taxi and we headed to the lift at 4:10.  Shortly before the ground floor we came to an [...]

I got glasses in second grade when I was 8 years old.  I finally stopped hating my short-sightedness when I was 17 and went to the States and got contacts.  Until then I felt disabled and ugly.  I couldn’t swim because I couldn’t see without glasses, I couldn’t play sport because after I broke my [...]

I’m frustrated. Frustrated that my emotional wellbeing depends on sleep so much.  A few nights of someone screaming uncontrollably every few hours and I’m all gloom and doom.  Yuck.  I wish I could just shrug it off like my other half, but I’m just a silly little emotional female model. We’re not sure what’s going [...]

Fun and games here, fun and games.  3 out of 5 of us were in turns throwing up last night until about 2. Oskar had another go after 4.  James ended up sleeping on the floor in the living room because although Oliver is ok, he was very restless with all the commotion that was [...]

It’s been a grey and wet day. I’ve been terribly sleepy since I woke… Fortunately the “working” day is almost over.