Estonians: people of few words and few clothes
Thursday, 11 August 2011 
9 Comments
"I love you" in Estonian
I have written at least a few times in the past how Estonians tend to have an issue with expressing their feelings verbally (here and here most recently). Whenever a nation has that kind of a common “issue”, you’d think that they would be a nation that’s really reserved, meek and modest.
Reserved they can be, but meek and modest?
I still am amazed every time I go to the beach there at how everyone is flaunting their bits (and often lots of them) in little bikinis. In other countries you often see large elderly women in the sea with bathing suits that have little skirts and maybe even little ruffles in the middle, but that kind of attire is not to be found in Estonia. In fact, you’d have a hard time to find even the skimpiest bathing suit on a beach in Estonia – it’s always a bikini. No matter your age or size.
I find it a bit confusing as it doesn’t line up with Estonians being emotionally reserved, but I also find it liberating because in wearing a bikini myself I can be sure that I look better in it than 98% of the people around me :)
Now the next place I don’t ever see any reservedness is the swimming pool, or more specifically in the shower rooms at a public swimming pool.
First of all, the signs on the sauna doors say that it’s FORBIDDEN to enter a sauna with your clothes on. I’m all for obeying the rules, so I don’t go into the public saunas at all :) – I have no desire to squeeze my naked bum next to someone else’s naked bum.
Then there are signs on the shower room walls say that one MUST wash herself before entering the pool. What do I do? I shower in my bikini for a minute. What do the reserved “real” Estonians do? They strip naked, lather themselves up and start scrubbing. They vigorously scrub in places that should never be scrubbed that vigorously when in public and especially when chatting to your friend next to you. I can only imagine how stunned the real tourists are when witnessing this.
For men I suspect the situation is similar. In the swimming pool it’s verboten to wear board shorts (!), speedos only. On the beach everyone but the tourists wear speedos as well and probably because a) they have them for the swimming pool anyway and b) that way most of their bodies can get that chocolate tan that most Estonians seem to acquire by mid July at the latest.
So yeah, for my people it’s hard to say “I love you” or “I’ll miss you”, but it’s no problem walking around half naked in broad daylight or stripping totally naked in very close proximity to strangers.
Hmmm…. not even going to try to psychoanalyze all that.
Ma noustun sinuga siin taielikult. Inimestel puudub habitunne ehk? Voi ollakse nii harjunud selle sauna kultuuriga, kus kaiakse maast madalast naiste ja meestega koos saunas. koigil on ju kusagil onu ja tadi, kelle juures on saun, kus peab kohe kaima koos vanematega. Ja meie, kes oleme alustanud elu teises kultuuri keskkonnas oleme tegelikult vohikud ja imelikud.
Its obvious that you have been visiting the beaches of Haapsalu this summer :D The percentage would not have been so great in Pärnu and Pirita (though I do not doubt that it would have been still high!).
I must say that overall I do not agree with your observations and furthermore cant really understand your problem. Probably because I have never considered myself as a doomy reserved Estonian, who has problems with expressing my feelings. And rare people amongst my friends and relatives are like that.
But is there really such controversy between being reserved in expressing feelings and wearing bikinis at the beach? Yes, Estonians are in general sun-worshipers, especially the older generation. But at least Estonian women do not bath topless as many English and German women do! And the Germans are reserved people as well. I cant see any correlation between temperament and ability to dress in skimpy bikinis.
Sauna culture is something that you understand or not. Yes, it comes from your background and mostly from your family. But rarely there are families who sauna men and women mixed up. Usually women go together and men go together. I haven’t seen anybody being banned from Estonian sauna for not taking off the swimming wear (and in Estonia these saunas you are talking about are same-sex saunas). I in most cases wont bother taking my bikinis off as well. I have however not been allowed to a German mixed-sex sauna with my bathing suit on.
And Siiri, I do not agree that Estonian people have no feeling of shame. What is here to be shameful about? Why must one feel shame for washing naked in women only shower room? Sorry, but yes I consider English people going to sauna with their sportswear on, and going to WC booth to change their clothes in all women changing room, strange.
Sorry for the steam, but I just thought somebody should stand up for the not so “strange” Estonians. We are not so all bad you know :)
It’s ok :) I am afterall, an Estonian as well, so I sort of get it, but I still find it very amusing how Estonians seem to be so liberated when it comes to their bodies (which is all good) yet not so liberated when it comes to saying nice things to each other and being able to (freely and enthusiastically) hug their aunties and uncles, etc. Of course I’m talking about the “older” generations, considering everyone who’s younger than me to be a bit more emotionally aware and open. So yeah, maybe the post doesn’t make much sense in the overall context of whole Estonia and all of it’s people, and is probably a better snapshot of a small seaside town.
we are not so bad of course :) and its always good to stand up and express your opinion. Reality is that i just came back from Estonia and i have mixed feelings. What bothered me most on the beach was men wearing speedos, don’t really care about women, everybody has their own choice and common sense, or not. And weird thing really was that men couldn’t wear shorts in the swimming pools. Here in Canada everybody wears shorts, unless you are 50 years old eastern European.
I totally absolutely 100 % agree with Mann!
I do not find men in Speedos disturbing at all, a lot better than nothing on (as I saw in Spain).
Sauna minna riided seljas on ebahügieeniline. Võta käterätik ümber pepu, kui avaliku saunaga tegemist on. Väga tervitatav, et eestlased end põhjalikult pesevad enne basseini minemist. Britid ei tee seda suur eriti ja basseinide vesi on ka äärmiselt räpane.
Turns out I’m a total prude! :) I’m all for hygiene and healthy body image, BUT I have a shower every morning so I don’t have any desire to soap myself up in the public shower and scrub my bits and bobs so that everyone can have a good look at my usually hidden anatomy.
lol at your last comment… I do get that reservedness but estonian’s unshamed body image stems from german culture where nakedness is natural and body (and its ability) is celebrated so I get it as well- I have no hiccups with naked saunas
Mis te seletate? Meil Streathami Virgin Active naiste riietusruumis (saun on samas kohas) on koik naised ilma bikiinideta/trikoota, pole yldse probleem. Selline tunna nagu olekski Eestis, kuigi saunakaaslane on voibolla Nigeeria paritolu:)