Torn. Thankful. Helpless. Confused. Sad.
It’s been a weekend of mixed emotions. I have stayed away from newspapers and actually hidden them so that the kids don’t see the headlines. I am not ready to explain.
If I still lived in the States I know I’d have to explain, and generally I don’t shy away from deep and meaningful conversations with my kids (more with the 7-yr old than the 4-yr old) but living in London now I am hiding this story from them… I don’t know whether this is the right thing to do or not, but it’s what I’m doing…
Other than that, we’ve had some fun moments this weekend but also a whole LOT of moaning and tantrums :| I don’t know if other parents feel the same, but when my kids have tantrums that just last on an on and on and morph into moaning that goes on and on an on – I totally feel like I’m failing at this parenting thing.
I always manage to talk through these situations but long sessions of explaining/guiding/negotiating/comforting/disciplining a child are so freaking emotionally exhausting.
And then there’s the issue of them being boys and loving playing with guns and I totally detest that kind of play but I just do not know whether there is any boy who does not like to play with guns and am just hoping that them knowing not to aim at others is enough…
Feelings to summarise this weekend: Gratitude mixed with a lot of Weltschmertz.